The Effect of Positivity on Resilience

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CherylKavinskiBayo

By Cheryl Bayo
School Counselor

“When a child is at their most unlovable is when they need the most love.”

It can be very hard to find the small positives in a world that is hectic for us and our students, especially with the rigorous academic challenges at a school like MMI. The pre-teen and teenage years are full of opportunities for children to express themselves in both positive and negative ways. The impact of a positive relationship between a child and parent (or other adult) has an effect on how they handle the choices they make. Rewarding students, even for the smallest positive, with the greatest reward of all-our time and attention – can have a big impact on how they think and react to many choices and obstacles.

You can start small. Find one positive thing every day and make it a point to enthusiastically stress to your child that you found them helpful, kind, or productive. Maybe they replaced the empty roll of toilet paper without being asked, or handed you your keys on a hectic morning so you could get out the door without having to look for them. 

How does this all tie to resilience? When your children have more and more positive interactions with you, they will begin to feel better about themselves on a larger scale. 

Never underestimate the power of positivity in a child’s development of their self- concept and self -esteem. A positive self-concept is the backbone to sustaining a resilient attitude.

How to praise effectively:

https://heartmindonline.org/resources/the-art-of-praise-encouraging-resilient-confidence

How praise helps in the classroom:

https://redtri.com/study-teacher-praise-increase-student-good-behavior/

Other resources:

https://www.verywellmind.com/what-is-self-concept-2795865

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